How Not to Write a Literature Review

1. Get up at 11am everyday, even weekdays. In fact have no schedule whatsoever. That really helps.

2. Once you actually get out of bed, leisurely have coffee, read a newspaper, check your email, watch the Ellen show, reminisce about old friends. Basically waste time doing nothing productive.

3. At about noon, just as you are about to start writing, realize you have not had lunch yet. Make something elaborate, in fact turn on the TV again. Maybe Racheal Ray is on and can show you something to make.

4. When lunch is over, 3 hours later, remember you need to go to a store that closes at 5pm. Well, need is a relative term. It is more like you want to go since they might have something you need. Reasons you can’t go tomorrow? Well, for one thing, you are going to be working hard tomorrow.

5. When you get back from the store, realize you haven’t had dinner. All those fresh ingredients Rachael Ray told you to buy are going to go bad. So make a couple of recipes, and watch TV while you eat, and after.

6. Boy, cooking sure make you tired. Relax a little and mess around on the internet. You deserve it. Whoops, stay away from research sites now.

7. Upload all those pics from last weekend. Tag and comment on all of them. Except of course the ones of your cousin and her new boyfriend who hasn’t facebooked you yet.

8. Sit and mope about your bum getting a little flabby. Decide to do something about your flabby bum right then and take a run. As you pass by the piles of research articles, remind yourself you have to take time for yourself.

9. Running with a flabby bum makes you really sweaty and sore. So take a nice warm bath, you deserve it after such a long day.

10. Well, its pretty late to start on research now, you wouldn’t get anything done before bed anyway. So put on your jammies and curl up with a book. Wow, what a day, how do you ever fit it all in? The problem is you just don’t have time for writing a literature reveiw, there’s just so much to do.